| 000; Severus Tobias Snape |
[28 January 2010 @ 19:47] |
Finale.
"No-one's going to take me alive; The time has come to make things right."
( Read more... )
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| 31 August 1980; [5:42] There are no happy endings because nothing ends. |
[01 September 2009 @ 2:55] |
[Warded Private]This is it, isn't it? This is what it's all come down to. The months of deception & the months of worry. The people I've had to watch die and the few I've managed to save from it. And if we lose, we lose everything - possibly our lives but most certainly the chance to live them in a way that an intelligent and free people ought to be able to but if we win -- If we win.
I don't know if I'll make it through to see another sunrise. I don't know if I'll live to pick up this journal one more time. I want to. I want to laugh and I want to love. I want to know that the sacrifices I and others have made have been worth it and that good people did not die in vain. But I'm not certain I want to if I'm doing it alone. I'm not certain I want to live if it's just me. I need Lils. And I want Agatha. But there are no guarantees are there? There never have been.
And whether I live or die, whether Lily and Agatha and Abe and Pepper live or die, I'm going to lose things. There's no easy way out. There is no happy ending. There's just the ending we make for ourselves.
And it's long past time.
[Warded to the Inner Circle]The Dark Lord is dead.
He died like the weak, pathetic, power-hungry coward that he was when he lived: Too arrogant in his own abilities to see that the world he'd created would turn against him. That the servant he'd created might have grown wiser than to blindly worship a man. That's right: a man. The Dark Lord was a man. He ate and slept and pooped and died arrogant in his power and infallibility.
And that's you right now - it's all of you. You sit in your estates, growing fat on wine and good food, arrogant enough to assume that the world you've strove to create will not fight against you even as you demean it, seek to control it, and kill its children.
Is this the greatness of wizarding traditions? I believed in you. I believed in all of you that you would make the Wizarding World a better place, but you have done nothing but destroy it. You use halfbreeds to control a population -- allowing werewolves and vampires and hags free reign to do whatever they will to those you cannot stoop to consider as human beings. You marry your daughters to men who would hunt down other human beings as if they were animals, return to their homes and wash their hands, and then sing lullabies to the babies who are brought into this world not for anything great but to continue a blood line. You order the deaths of children - unborn babies of magical blood - because of your blind trust in a man who would as soon kill you if he thought you a threat to his powers.
You speak of how dangerous Muggles are to witches and wizards, but you are the greatest threat to the survival of Wizarding traditions and Magical history. It is no Muggle that has torn apart the Wizarding World, no, that's you. And this mere man who thought he could control the people.
But we will not be controlled, and he is dead.
And we will kill you. The people are angry and we are tired of your arrogance. And you cannot silence us. The more you try, the louder we will become. I already killed your lord; & we're going to win.
Oh, and Minister Nott, sir? If I see you today you will get one cruciatus for every time you've directly or indirectly referred to me or my wife as dirty halfbloods. Go fuck yourself.
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| 29 August 1980; And now... |
[29 August 2009 @ 8:31] |
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mood |
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 thoughtful |
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[Warded Private] Well. That's done. The secret is out. At least to those on the side I've been fighting for and it wasn't as difficult as I was expecting it might be. On the other hand, Lupin & Black, the two that might have made it truly difficult for me, are both dead and the others do not really know me or have any history with me.
Even if it was difficult, it wouldn't matter. This is the decision I've made and I'll follow it through. For Lils. For Abe. For Agatha.
There really is no turning back now & even if there were - I wouldn't.
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| 27 August 1980; Preparations. |
[27 August 2009 @ 0:18] |
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mood |
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[Warded to Agatha] It sounds as if Moody is all right with moving us into Hogwarts soon. I don't know precisely when that will be but it might be good to be ready to go at a moment's notice. When he is ready for us, I will be ready.
I I also don't really know how that will go. He implied he'd be telling the larger group about us and I think those that really truly disliked me are, for the most part, no longer among the living of the group, but they may still not be pleased about it or trust me and they might take that out on you, and I'd just like to apologise ahead of time for that - if it even happens. It may not. But if I were them I wouldn't particularly have any fondness for me or particularly trust me plus I'm a Slytherin on top of being a former Death Eater, so it won't surprise me if it does.
In other less pleasant news the Death Eaters have me spending 16 hours a day baby-sitting Tinworth since the werewolves aren't able to manage it on their own. Thus beginning tomorrow I will be away from pretty much 6am to 10pm. I suppose on the bright side I am not likely to injure people in the same way the wolves do, but I will be perfectly happy if Moody allows us at Hogwarts sooner rather than later.
ETA; Can we be ready by tomorrow night?
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| 23 August 1980; |
[24 August 2009 @ 0:45] |
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mood |
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tired |
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[Warded to Moody] I am copying you a list of names. These are the listed subscribers to the Quibbler, and these same names are also going to Inner Circle Death Eaters. I know you've only got so much that you can do, but if there's a way to get word out that Death Eaters might pay attention to who subscribes to the Quibbler in a 'it's a conspiracy theory, but a convincing one' sort of way, that would probably be good. And the writers of the Quibbler are in danger as well - but my guess is they're already aware of that considering.
Also so long as there are copies to confiscate from the post I can drop a confiscated copy at your flat if that would be helpful. That way you lot can continue copying them into journals so that at least those with journals will continue to receive the stories.
And on a non-Quibbler note, I dropped the healing potions I have made at the flat and you can let me know if there is anything else that would be useful.
Finally, I had one other thing I'd like to discuss and that is simply this. I want Agatha and I to come to Hogwarts before you're ready to call the Death Eaters into a fight. I'd also like the people on your side to know that I'm on your side. I've had enough fun trying not to get hexed in the back by any of them the past year. They "know" I'm a Death Eater and if they stumble across me fighting - they may or may not stop to notice that I'm hexing other Death Eaters not Order members.
This does not need to happen immediately, of course, in fact unless you're absolutely certain Lupin was your only spy it's probably best to happen just before, but I frankly don't fancy getting hexed in the back from my own side, so I would like for it to happen enough before that they have the opportunity to get used to the idea.
If that's possible.
[Warded Private]I'm torn between being angry we're down two more fighters and being relieved that I don't have to contend with Black & Lupin's reaction to this news. At the moment I'm so exhausted, that I feel - perhaps selfishly because tactically the former would make more sense - all right with being the latter.
[Warded to Agatha]Quibbler on the table, same instructions as before only with the extra warning of don't reveal the pictures - they're nasty.
I don't know if I'm growing immune, or if I'm just too weary to work up the energy to be angry or surprised.
You wouldn't happen to have any of that back salve would you?
[Warded to Lily]You're doing all right?
The lies people will write.
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| 20 August 1980; Truth will set you free. |
[20 August 2009 @ 14:56] |
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mood |
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[Warded to Agatha] I confiscated a Quibbler from the post and it is on the kitchen table. When you're finished reading it, burn it.
I don't doubt that every word is true. I know that the part about the Foundation Centre is.
[Warded Private]How can you make a bill that is based upon such faulty science? I'd like to think that the fact that it was tabled was because it was reprehensible, but I think it more likely that it was tabled because of timing and they would have attempted it again in the future.
I become more and more convinced that what I am at least doing the right thing here.
[Warded to Moody]I've no idea if you are behind the Quibbler's latest article, but I'm going to assume you were aware of it.
They're doing clean-up at the Foundation - an 'official' investigation to ensure that the Quibbler is not 'accurate'. If any of the July mothers or their families attempt to speak out they will be silenced. And I assume your informant is already safe, because I can't imagine they won't look at everyone who potentially had access to those memos.
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| 18 August 1980; [5:34am] |
[18 August 2009 @ 5:34] |
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mood |
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[Warded to Moody] Right. So I have information for you.
Abe they had on a ridiculous number of potions. There's a reason someone like Gaius Travers should not be in charge of anything 'health' related. If I'd known about half of these I'd have - and I'm not a healer. Anyway. Over-medicated - mediwitches said they cut the doses and the number back at some point, so he had less in his system by the time your lot rescued him.
I couldn't find out much on Tabitha except that apparently Bellatrix Lestrange went to see her and she had injuries (not surprising) that they had to heal up.
I couldn't find much about Gina isn't it? She's with the Albion group, I think. Travers saw her frequently and apparently she once threw a plate at him - good on her - but otherwise, nothing.
How are preparations going there?
[Warded to Inner Circle]I have already given each of you that I have seen your portkeys. Where do we want the rest and how do we wish to distribute them?
& a thought occurred to me that those of us who have been going through the mail have found any number of individuals whom in one way or another seem to support if not the entirety of the terrorists cause, a part of it. Following upon Minister's Nott's suggestion I wonder if perhaps Greyback and his army ought to be given the task of researching any questionable post with a full search to ensure they are not giving support to the terrorists in more than words.
[Warded Private, Agatha may read]It's good to have Abe back.
And Merlin help me, I think I am going to make things worse for any number of people. Hopefully it will make it better sooner rather than later.
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| 16 August 1980. |
[16 August 2009 @ 21:31] |
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mood |
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 infuriated |
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[Warded Private] Let's see here:
- Allowed himself to get captured by a former "supposedly" rehabilitated patient.
- Who was not actually rehabilitated.
- Allowed a second attack on a centre that had already been targeted
- ...without apparently preparing for the possibility that they might attack it again.
- & asked for assistance in such a way that was completely ignorable if one did not have one's journal open
I did not even look at it until this morning
Successes are markedly less than failures from the get go and he outranks me now? So far as they know I killed the Longbottoms. How the bloody hell am I in the Inner Circle and that ponce outranks me?
I should not care about this. I killed the bloody Dark Lord. I've betrayed all of them and would see them all in Azkaban & if there is any justice in the world Gaius Travers will get life with a dementor next-door, but it is humiliating. Not to mention the logic behind this decision is absolutely incomprehensible.
I am outranked by Travers.
[Warded to Demetrius]How are we rewarding incompetence now?
How are you feeling?
[Added ward to Travers, Inner Circle]I know that I gave my apologies earlier, Gaius, but words are empty unless followed by actions.
I will be finished with my current task by this evening, and I will come by tomorrow and assist in any way I am able with the rebuilding of the centre. It has done an excellent work these past few months, as evidenced by Miss Hall, and it is essential to the growth of the community.
Unless it is inconvenient, I shall come by after I am finished at the Minister's office.
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| 16 August 1980; |
[16 August 2009 @ 13:50] |
[Warded Private]For Merlin's sake are we handing out promotions for any heroic deed now?
I am not the only Death Eater who did not respond and my lack of response was because I was working on a task for the Dark Lord rather than no excuse at all (no surprise at all). If Gaius particularly wanted people to pay attention, perhaps he should have charmed his entry to ring and be annoying. It is not a part of my body that is attached to me as is say, the Dark Mark.
I am so bloody sick of these damn portkeys. I've turned practically every tiny insignificant thing within sight into one and I am fairly confident I do not have enough. I have no idea who 'the important' people are other than probably not halfblood Agatha or I.
Well fuck you, Nott. I already have a portkey and so does my wife and we did months before you happened to think of it (or actually didn't happen to think of it since it seems you got that idea from a vigilante didn't you then?)
Returning to the actual issue at hand and ignoring my supreme dislike of my boss I have absolutely no idea how many to make and there is a large difference between Death Eaters, their wives and families, or First and second tier Death Eaters, their wives and families, or every Pureblood in the entirety of Britain and those fullbloods and halfbloods who have happened to pledge their lives to the cause. Is some guidance or direction too bloody much to ask for? "Each person who is important", is actually not direction or guidance, Minister Nott.
I miss Mr Lestrange - he didn't say much, but he was more succinct and clear than the entire rest of the Inner Circle together.
[Warded to Inner Circle]The portkey project is progressing on schedule. However, I am running out of small, easily concealed objects with which to use to create portkeys. If anyone has anything they would be willing to owl me it would be appreciated; If not then small rocks from my garden will work, but obviously lack elegance.
[Warded to Moody]I'm guessing the death toil is less than reported.
Abe? Did you get Abe?
[Warded to Agatha]I'm going to take lunch in the workshed; could you bring it out there?
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| 14 August 1980. |
[14 August 2009 @ 23:17] |
[Warded Private, Agatha may read]It seems we are abandoning any pretence at being a free nation. Perhaps that has been true since the borders were closed, but now we are going to be reading people's post and making notes of individuals who subscribe to The Quibbler.
Eventually we will push the population too far. I feel as if that may have already begun to happen, but eventually we begin to infringe on the larger population's rights, and once we began to do that, they will revolt. The question is whether that will happen immediately or if it is still months or even years away. And in the meantime good people like the Longbottoms are destroyed and I worry whether we can last long enough.
It is perhaps a wonder that I was able to manage even a misty Patronus charm so much unpleasant has been on my mind of recent. And if I should be discovered and our wards should not hold
[Warded to Pepper]It was on the WWN so this isn't particularly a large secret, but rather something to be aware of. They're having us search the owl post for any mention of terrorist activity and making a list of people who receive The Quibbler.
I don't doubt people will continue to receive The Quibbler through some means or another, but it is something to be aware of. The post - even were it ever safe - is certainly no longer so.
[Warded to Moody]This was on the WWN so it isn't particularly a secret, but I wanted to make certain you and anyone you are working with is aware that Death Eaters will be looking through the Post, and making lists of people who are receiving The Quibbler, etc.
[Warded to Agatha]So long as we do not have a fidelius charm on our property there's some danger even at home.
You said you could feign illness for a while, but eventually that would prove not true, wouldn't it then? What if this lasts for more than a month or two? What if it lasts for any number of months? We could fake it for nine months but if you don't have a child at the end of it, we can't really fake that, can we?
It's rather difficult to believe that Autumn is drawing ever nearer. I hope we will be able to have a proper school for children to attend by September.
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